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In today’s fast world, parenting needs to be a joint effort between both parents. But instead, a lot of women are left parenting their husbands in addition to the kids.
Juggling the multiple tasks at home such as cooking, laundering, grocery shopping, babysitting, all in addition to taking of the husband, can lead to the lady of the house getting quite exhausted. Especially if you add a career outside of home into the mix.
The Men of the House Stress Their Wives Out
Surveys and research have shown that in a relationship, it is often the woman who is more stressed than the man. And this is not only because of the responsibilities of motherhood, tough as they are but because the husbands do not shoulder their own responsibilities and pass them on to the wives. Out of 7000 wives surveyed, it was found that 46% of them were stressed more by their husbands than their children.
Some of the most common comments were that:
-One out of five husbands do not pick up their share of the housework, leaving the wife to handle all the stress that comes with the many home responsibilities
-Two-Thirds of the women surveyed said that they had to shoulder all the parenting duties alone
-Most of the participating women were upset at not getting enough time to complete the housework, leave alone for themselves
Interestingly, further research conducted at the University of Padova found out that husbands who lost their wives declined in terms of health and wellbeing, but women who lost their husbands had improved stress levels, and healthier lives. This implied easily that men relied heavily on their wives for their well-being, whereas the women were forced to stand alone.
How Do Husbands Exactly Stress Out Their Wives?
They Don’t Contribute At Home Enough
It is a very reasonable expectation from wives that their partners help out at home and the kids. Doctor visits and school PTA meetings are not the wife’s job. But even when the wife has a career of her own, and especially when she doesn’t, she is dumped with all the house- and child-work.
Resolution: As a wife, you need to have open communication with your husband. Let him know how taking care of all the housework stresses you out. Sit down together and jot a list of the different responsibilities, and note which ones he can start to take care of. Mark important dates on a common calendar and on the fridge so that doctor visits and school visits are not forgotten by either parent.
Women Blindly Pick Up What their Husbands Drop
The more the husband stops doing stuff about the house, the more the wife takes on her own plate, without realizing how destructive it is for the both of them. Your husband isn’t necessarily lazy – you might not be trusting enough when it comes to getting something done.
Resolution: As a wife, you might have a certain picture of how things should be done around the house. A long-term vision of where you want your kids to be in the future. And if the husband doesn’t do something himself, it might seem easier to just do it yourself. But resist that temptation the next time, and get him to do it for you. It’ll work out easier in the long run.
Partners Forget to Date When They Become Parents
As a husband and wife progress from being a couple to being parents, they often let their regard for each other slide. And that is the biggest cause of a relationship going downhill. It isn’t healthy for you, your husband, or your children!
Resolution: Set aside some time for just you and your husband. Having your partner’s emotional support, even if not physical support around the house, may make it easier to face some of the tougher days. And it will also make your family a happier unit, as good relations between parents always do.